Archive for March, 2012

Both of these states are internal and state of mind. As they are state of mind, they influence the way we perceive the world around us. According to Oxford dictionary, this is the meaning of Security:

The state of being free from danger or threat (of any kind).

We need to be naive to disagree that true security is more cliché then reality. We live a life which is influenced by billions of factors on moment by moment basis. Is it practically possible to be free from all threats and dangers?

I guess we all know the answer. No, we can’t be free from the threats or dangers totally. However what we can and usually do is manage these threats and dangers as and when they arise, to our best capacity at that given moment. Now new angle has been added. Same person can be better or ill suited to handle a challenge on any given moment. It means, it is not only the capacity and smartness to defend ourselves and our interest but also timing is important. In short, playing defensive is the name of the game. Fear is the key emotion. You may be rich or poor, powerful or common man, but affected by fear. Big business owners and political leaders are good example for this aspect.

On the contrary, freedom is defined in Oxford dictionary as :

The power or right to act, speak, or think (or do) as one wants

Here being comfortable in your own skin is the key emotion. You may be rich or poor but feeling of freedom reflects in your day to day response. For example, Sachin Tendulkar may be very rich and famous but is he free to do what he wants?

You may or may not have much provision to deal with what life may throw at you but you are sure that whatever comes your way, you will deal with it as it comes. As a matter of fact one can never be completely prepared for what future holds for us.  Normally freedom brings joyful state naturally. In such state, what is done is enjoyed. Many new ideas are created in such state of mind. It is natural that you would be more present focused than anything of past of future.


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When you set a goal for yourself and are at Activity stage, mindset goes through a shift. The mind is tuned to the goal on 24/7 basis. The external or internal activity is continuous without reminder. The way to life goes through a shift and people can feel that difference. While you are at it, the key is to be consistent and your actions should match with where you are heading.

If you are going towards success, you cannot behave like a loser. If you are a reaching to a evolve state, you response to the world cannot full of sorrow, hatred or distrust. The internal progress will reflect on the external world. You external success is only a sign that internal success is taking place.

In present times when the river of our life flows extremely fast, maintaining balance is a challenge. So many fronts we are facing in a day and a role mask for each of them. While there may be playing different roles, what is essential that we do not lose the true self within. If we cannot hold on to the basic principals in life, our act and actions are not coherent. This is sure sign for failure in long run.

Be Candid

                Be Resolute

                                Be Honest

                                                Be Truthful

                                                                           Be Humble

 Success will triumph for those who practiced what they preached.

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What do we consider as dream?

  • Something which we conceived in sleep or sleepy state
  • Pleasant or not hence desirable or not
  • Saw in real life but beyond reach.

You ask a university student, “What is your dream”? He will tell you things which he wishes to achieve, do or have. And ask the same person, the same question after 10 years. You would be surprised by his current list of dream. What has happened here? Traditional society has copy pasted itself into one more person. He now runs from pillar to post trying to arrange for his needs. His dreams are now replaced by his needs. The situations around him are so challenging that earlier dreams have faded away as lesser priority and eventually forgotten.

Compelling Reason on the other hand, is something which you can give your life for. This is not something you can forget and let go. This is something that gives you hope in life. It can be material or non material, quantifiable or not. For example, for a man who can’t keep his family with him in city due to high cost of living, finding all ways & means to make it happen, is natural.

Lets use a corollary here. I give you a car with GPS & map also with it. And tell you to go to a place 600 km away. Will you go there for no reasons?

On the contrary, I have no car, GPS or map to offer. But I have a piece of information. If you can reach to a specific place which is 600 km away, a suitcase with US$ 10 million is waiting for you. Now will you go there?

We know the answer. You will do what it takes, to get there and claim the bag. Why take the journey? Because you have a compelling reason! This is just an example to get the feel of it.

Compelling reason can give meaning to a person’s life. This is something that you want in your life and is non-negotiable.

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Duplication This is a stage whereby you have mastered the path you have chosen and may have attained success. The process, all the understanding of the journey, looks so simple when you look back. The success may bring certain freedom which could be very intoxicating. What you experience at this stage is personal. If you share with others they will not know what you are really talking about.

While enjoying what you have achieved you feel empathy for others who still are struggling. The biggest difference between you and them is mindset. What you have become in the process is nothing else but the present mindset is; whatever that may mean to you.

Most people are happy living miserable lives. Miserable life has become so commonplace that we even do not see if there is a misery in their life. Repeating same thing over and over again for lifetime is never noticed though we are broke and bored to death with it. We have our own mindset and are happy holding onto it. Most people have gathered so much of knowledge that their backbone & mind is very rigid. This is known identified as Cup Full Syndrome. Such people are almost impossible to coach. In their definition receiving indicates not having already, which is not acceptable. Such people only learn by experience, good or bad. Life can only be their teacher till they realize that there is a possibility to learn from other’s also. They do not necessarily have to undergo the same experience personally to know the outcome. Meanwhile much water has flown under the bridge.

There are some who are willing to learn from others experience and ready to suspend their judgment. But these are few and far in between. They work on blind trust to start and it converts into belief over period of time. It is not that they have less intelligence or access to knowledge. On the contrary, one needs to be sharp to make this choice, instead of reinventing the wheel. It is a choice to let go, holding someone’s hand who has been through that journey.

This means one must not stop at one person and must reach out to more and more people. Some will see significance of what you want to share and what it can do to their lives. Most won’t see much in what you are sharing. Eventually you will have few willing people, who are ready to do what it takes. You may gradually share your knowing depending on the receiving pace. Knowledge can only be in past, knowing is ever in the present moment.

Over period of time, you will have to play various roles; guide, a friend, a teacher to name a few. Sometimes you would be most gentle and caring while on other occasion you may come so harsh that recipient will get shocked. Between the two extremes, you mould the person slowly, patiently. In this process, you try and evoke understanding and subsequently the knowing as you experienced.

This is known to be a thankless and painful process but once the change happens in the person, their joy and freedom surpasses all your pains. And you go on sharing what you have found, time & time again.

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At a stage when ownership is taken, activity is natural step. Whatever the situation one may be in and whatever may the way out be, activity is the doing part. At this point, one would seek out the activities to be performed. Usually another person who has been through the same path will be helpful to guide. Sometime we are asking the right person and sometimes not.  But the eagerness is so much that we are ready to do what is given. Whatever it takes, we are ready to do. Nobody needs to remind us or push us.

As in most cases, significant issues in life need significant effort before a change can happen, results can be felt. Patience levels are different for each individual. Some sooner, some later, question the process and path. At this time hope seems to be the only support. We try finding short cuts and new methods.  If you had a good guide, you will come back to the same path, after knocking other doors. Sometime life itself becomes teacher and we are able to see the multitude of factors involved in each scene as it develops. We realize, there is more to the happening of the events then my doing. A new kind of acceptance happens. This acceptance is of knowing that there is more to life then we can see. There are many more factors influencing our lives, events and outcomes.

The combination of commitment to continue doing the activity and at the same time accepting the outcomes of the action without any disappointment is unique. The change that happens in a person is noticed by other around them. A calmness downs on the person and he can participate in the events without much variation in his emotional scale. Life around us becomes teacher for such person. Activity and activity until one day he would attain that, for which he had set his goal.

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Taking Ownership

Soon we find out that there are so many ways to reach our goal. Different methods also mean different journey & time to reach goal, which is perplexing and confusing. There is so much verity to choose from, that one goes numb. Procrastination has been known to be usually outcome of this situation. Life goes on and from time to time, we keep collecting knowledge. In process we explore and go through almost like a roller coaster of rights and wrongs declared by various philosophies. We keep collecting and storing, debating among friends & family. Many times we claim to be knowing more & better tha others. In process, ego starts rising and friends start dropping.

In most cases, a challenge, tragedy or uncomfortable situation, which shakes us from our comfort zone or which we refuse to tolerate anymore, pushes us to get into next gear. We become intense in our search of a method or path, following which we can find our comfort again. Many a times it is a short detour but sometimes it is a jolt. One can’t accept life as it was going on anymore. Once this switch has happened, most issues are no more issues. The focus is on Goal and nothing will deter from pursue it. We can clearly see the difference in inconvenience and challenge. We do not get disheartened by failure instead we rise again. Any hurdle on the path, we don’t stand in front and wonder what to do. Now we find a way around the hurdle. We are more adopting and ready to accept that we do not know and remain ready to learn. It is natural that ego may start to come down. At this stage, we take ownership of changing our lives by making focused effort.

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